Enlightenment from the Internet and Beyond!

Did you know that Jesus had an automobile? He drove them from the temple in a Fury!

Also, Noah was a nimble cash manager. He floated his assets while the world was in liquidation.

Did you know that they played tennis in ancient Egypt? They must have, because Joseph served in Pharaoh’s court.

Did you know that the apostles drove a Honda? In Acts it says they were all in one Accord.

Did you know that King David had a motorcycle? The sound of his Triumph was heard throughout the country.

And just to show you that mother’s have had their work cut out for them down through the ages:

Alexander the Great’s mother: “How many times do I have to tell you that you can’t have everything you want in this world!”

Franz Schubert’s mother: “Take my advice, son. Never start anything you can’t finish.”

Achilles’ mother: “Stop imagining things. There’s nothing wrong with your heel.”

A story heard some time ago, goes something like this: A bishop was visiting a parish and during the offertory procession was seated beside the pastor in the sanctuary. As the leotard-clad dancing girls drew nearer, the bishop whispered to the pastor: “If they ask for your head on a plate, I will gladly give it to them.”